Signs and Patterns of Codependency
Codependent relationships are any relationship where one person puts everybody else’s needs ahead of their own. This may be seen in a romantic relationship, a family, or a friendship. Common patterns of codependency that occur between codependent partners or another codependent person include:
- Compliance – doing what others want to avoid change, making somebody angry, or to get approval, even if it involves staying in a dangerous or harmful situation
- Denial – minimizing or denying their own unpleasant feelings, labeling other negatively, or masking their own pain, not taking care of themselves so they do not have to set limits with others
- Having low self-esteem – having difficulty making their own decisions and seeking validation from others, or relying on others to feel safe
- Control – believing nobody else will be able to “do a good job” taking care of others the way they do, using sexual attention to get approval, using passive aggression or shaming others to control them emotionally
- Avoidance of intimacy – avoiding intimacy or acting in ways that incite anger or rejection from others to create emotional distance, believing displays of emotion or affection are signs of weakness
Codependency recovery is not easy, but with the help of the right program in the right treatment center, you will be able to heal from codependency.
How To Recover from Codependency in 10 Steps
Although every person struggling with codependency is unique, according to the Codependents Anonymous recovery program there are steps you can take as a recovering codependent person to create healthy boundaries and change the way you think and behave. These include:
- Joining a support group and knowing that you belong and will not be alone in your struggles
- Not allowing fear or unpleasant feelings to control you, facing new situations with courage and dignity
- Finding freedom as you conquer codependency and enter codependency recovery
- Letting go of guilt and worry about your past, forgiving yourself and moving forward with the goal of not repeating history
- Loving and accepting your loved ones and yourself, leaving low self-esteem behind
- Seeing yourself as equal to others in all relationships, and that others can take care of themselves
- Knowing you are capable to have and maintain a healthy relationship that functions normally
- Learning that it is healthy for you to set limits and healthy boundaries, and you can change the way you communicate with friends and family
- Knowing you are valuable, lovable, and it is important to take care of yourself
- Realizing it is not necessary to get external validation from others, your self-worth comes from within
The Codependency Addiction Connection
Codependency used to be a term that was only used for people who would enable substance abuse in their loved ones, manifesting in partners who are abusing drugs together, close adult family members of drug abusers and/or children of drug abusers, finding themselves in a caretaking role for the drug abuser and eventually falling into long-term patterns of codependency.
The codependent behavior exhibited by these individuals not only enables continued substance abuse, but the codependent person may also fear their partner will not need them anymore if the addiction is resolved, and they may try to get in the way of addiction treatment or cause the person to relapse after addiction treatment is over. For this reason, recovery from codependency through anger management, family therapy or couple’s therapy in an integrated dual diagnosis treatment plan may be necessary alongside addiction treatment.
Getting Help for Drug and Alcohol Dependency at TruPath
At TruPath treatment center, we can help you recover from codependency at the same time as you receive treatment for substance use disorders. Our integrated dual diagnosis program treats mental health disorders, behavioral conditions, medical issues and social disorders alongside individual and group addiction therapy, biofeedback treatments, holistic care, education, and other programming.
Through customized recovery programs, we can help you not only overcome your drug and alcohol dependence, but also set boundaries and heal codependent relationships, forgiving yourself as you set boundaries, and start recovering in a rejuvenated, healthy relationship with loved ones. If you are struggling with codependency, contact the TruPath team today to find out more about healing codependency in recovery, getting in touch with resources like codependents anonymous, and how we can get you started on the path to taking care of yourself, your addiction, and your mental health disorders today.